Sunday, January 15, 2006

In My Bedroom...

continued.... Chapter two

I was but thirteen or fourteen years old and my mother had very specific rules. One of which was bed time. So I had been asleep for several hours when something woke me. I looked to my clock, bleeping colored hands glowing from my dresser top, confused because I never woke up at night. It was midnight. I started to roll over and search for the comfort of a good nights sleep when I saw her. At first I hid beneath the covers, blinked my eyes and peeked out again as if the bedding some how protected me. Slowly I let the covers down.

There, in what was usually the darkest corner of my room, hovering just below the ceiling was where I first locked eyes with her. She was so beautiful, floating there in a fog of soft translucent haze, her gentle eyes probing mine as if expecting to find fear or horror reflected there. I was not afraid. If anything my reaction was exactly the opposite that you would think it to be. I was suddenly calm, curious, and somehow reassured by her presence. Her hair and gauzy looking clothing moved in a gentle breeze I could not feel. She was almost victorian in her appearance and I had the impression she was very very 'old', altho' I was certain her age was no more than twenty or so.

I don't really understand, even now, how come I wasn't scared half to death. Yes, the ouija board experience had had a profound affect on me and had only been the night before. Yet I wonder if I had met her without that experience just how I would have reacted. After all, not every young teen wakes up in the middle of the night to find an apparition, a ghost, watching over her. I did think she was watching over me. The feeling was strangely reassuring, safe and almost gently calming. I smiled at her and her eyes seemed to sparkle back at me. Now, of the rare few who I have told this to I have been asked if I thought she was an angel. Never, not once, did that thought even fleetingly cross my mind. Not being all that religious it wasn't something I would think to begin with. It also just didn't even seem, in retrospect, appropriate. She wasn't an angel and she wasn't evil. She was a friendly spirit who hovered there watching over me with gentle eyes. Or so I thought.

Many nights followed that I would awaken to find her there. Sometimes I only saw her fleetingly, the image vanishing into a disipating fog, and my own dark bedroom corner coming slowly into focus. Other times I lay awake, waiting for her, only to see a shimmer of reflection which never took shape. Each of the times that I saw her clearly were those when I woke near midnight to find her there, watching me. After a time I began to feel invaded, as if not knowing if she would be there or not was somehow an invasion of my privacy.

Eventually I started speaking to her. Cautiously I asked who she was and stupid childish things, are you ok?, do you want to tell me something?, and such. Confusion reflected in her eyes and the more I said the faster the image would fade. Then I started demanding to know what she wanted, as if expecting a reply! I had become too accustomed to seeing her, too confident of her friendliness. Too complacent in my belief of her good intentions. I guess I was working on crossing a line, because things began to change. I wanted to know what she wanted, why she wouldn't leave, and soon began to demand she leave me alone. I wasn't sleeping through the night any more, and had been startled out of my sleep too often.

I was young and foolish and at first didn't even notice the change in her. I didn't see at first the way her clothes were becoming ragged, her hair seemingly matted instead of flowing. I had grown used to her and so frustrated by her existence that I didn't see what should have scared me. Until the night I looked into her eyes and realized they were dark hollows instead of warm orbs. She scared me and again I hid. Finding solace in the pillow over my head, the covers pulled up to block my view. I would wake and avoid looking in the corner, squeezing my eyes shut and praying for the security and comfort of sleep. That line had been crossed and soon terror would replace comfort. Soon her true intentions would become evident.

..............to be continued..................





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